shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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