yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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