I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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