My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
you would pick up someone in the library
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
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