Kiss
Puke
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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