the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
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