I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
