He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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