After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
