Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
