We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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