i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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