Pregnant stripper...not hot.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize
