Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize