so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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