So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
