You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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