i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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