found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I need a hoe opinion
go on
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
