I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
