i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
