i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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