Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(815): View more from Illinois

Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night

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(914): View more from New York

Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.

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(314): View more from Missouri

She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

She puked her nose ring out of her face.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.

(502): View more from Kentucky

Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.

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(404): View more from Georgia

I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM

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