oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
