fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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