After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
