Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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