dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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