Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
