"it" just moved
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
