I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
