I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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