i just google imaged poop.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Randomize