I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
