problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
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