he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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