conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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