Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
