if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
