The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize