Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
