whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
