Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
