weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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