This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
