Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
