wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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