Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize