When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
