dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize