a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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