quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I could fuck to npr.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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