i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
