there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
