i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
